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Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Botty Problems

Yaxlich presents the Top Ten most popular holiday destinations for agoraphobic Peruvians on a week off work.

1. The living room
2. The bathroom
3. The kitchen
4. The bedroom
5. The hallway
6. The stairs
7. Just outside Yaxlich's bedroom door
8. Next to the electric meter cupboard
9. Hovering around the flat generally
10. All of the above

Yaxlich had a curry last night.

Current Clenchometer Reading : High

Chances of agoraphobic Peruvian leaving the flat in the next 5 days : Low. Very.

Comments on "Botty Problems"


Blogger Lizza said ... (9:03 pm) : 

The agoraphobic Peruvian has to sleep sometime, doesn't she? :-)


Blogger Yaxlich said ... (12:02 am) : 

It seems that when a Peruvian is scared to leave the house, they also become unable to sleep without the slightest noise awakening them.

Yaxlich thinks a shuffle to the nearest pub tomorrow morning is in order. The nearest one has acceptable toilet facilities. He will, however, take his own toilet roll disguised in a knitted angel carrying a wand.


Blogger Tish said ... (1:33 am) : 

How does an agoraphobic Peruvian even get to Yaxlich's house? All that open space and people and stuff, do they come wrapped in a paper bag or something? Tish is dying to know.

Could Yaxlich maybe take a photo of his wand angel in her cardy at the pub?


Anonymous Sim said ... (11:05 am) : 

Just don't use one of those London automatic numbers Yax - I've been told by one sorry victim that they open up again after 15 minutes (should you need longer) and then spray you with detox.


Blogger Yaxlich said ... (11:55 am) : 

Tish - Yaxlich does not know how the Peruvian gets here. She just appears as if by magic. Just like Mr Benn's shop keeper.

Sim - Yaxlich will steer clear of these new fangled technology toilets. 15 minutes will not suffice. He does like a good read whilst dropping the kids off at the pool so he would have barely got beyond the sports pages before revealing his bowel evacuations to the world.


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