Yesterday

Yesterday was the anniversary of the day Yaxlich entered the world via his mummys front bottom. Most people call this a birthday. It wasn't a particularly significant birthday. The number of candles on his cake were more than could be counted using a combination of toes and fingers but weren't sufficient to have the fire brigade on standby. Not that Yaxlich had a cake. Yaxlich doesn't like being 37. He thinks that 37 isn't a good age to be because it was the first birthday he can remember where he hasn't had birthday cake and regular readers* will know that Yaxlich likes cake. He really likes chocolate cake and he usually gets a chocolate cake on his birthday but this year there was no cake, chocolate or otherwise. His sister invited him round for a birthday dinner which she insisted on referring to as a birthday tea which made Yaxlich feel like he was 5 again. A birthday tea suggests jam sandwiches cut up into triangles. Bowls and bowls of cheesy wotsits, twiglets and salt and vinegar crisps. Jelly and ice cream. Balloons. Birthday cake. Yaxlich had chicken curry. It was a very nice chicken curry and it was nice to see his sister and her family but no matter how much he likes chicken curry, it's not chocolate cake. You can't put candles in chicken curry. You can't cut it up into small pieces and take it home with you in a paper napkin. Being 37 just doesn't seem to be much fun. However, he hopes that all this will change. This afternoon he is going to go on a ferry which he is very excited about. He's going to visit his parents on the Isle of Wight. He likes the Isle of Wight. The old shops, the smell of the sea, the squawk of the seagulls, the ancient ruins, the unspoilt countryside, the rustle of incontinence pants. He hopes that his mummy has made him a cake. He's sure she will have done because Yaxlich is mummys brave little soldier. * - when Yaxlich refers to readers being regular he is referring to the amount of times they visit his blog rather than the amount of fibre in their diet and their subsequent bowel movements although he does hope that his readers are not constipated. If they are, can he suggest some of his sisters chicken curry? That should do the job.