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: a collection of amusing tales from the UK blogosphere.

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Friday, July 13, 2007

AdSense Of Humour

Yaxlich has just been chuckling at his latest AdSense ads:

Don't Put Up With Piles

Saddest Thing On The Internet

He thinks someone is trying to tell him something. Quite possibly that it's 2AM on Friday 13th and it's time for bed.

Strange Blogging Coincedence

Yaxlich has just learnt that Iggy was born in the same hospital as him.

He wonders if any of his readers are also suffering from a bad case of Farmer Giles too.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

The One Where Yaxlich Gets Piles

Yaxlich has a young niece with whom he occasionally chats on MSN Messenger. He only understands every third word she says. She uses some kind of secret code that only teenagers and Scaryduck understand. Every now and then Uncle Yaxlich has to ask his teenage niece to explain what all of the shorthand means. He learnt recently, for example, that TMI stands for Too Much Information.

He wonders if his niece would consider this to be TMI.

Ever since the AP moved into the flat permanently at the beginning of the year, Yaxlich has had to be even more selective with his trips to the toilet. He regularly stores them up for when she might pop out to do some gardening or go to the newsagent to collect her copy of Pan Pipe Weekly. These rare comfort breaks tend to be something of a rush job. No longer can Yaxlich read an entire newspaper in one sitting, he has to get in, get the job done and get out in a matter of minutes.

As a result, Yaxlich has got piles.

Using a cunning arrangement involving a shaving mirror and the edge of the bath, Yaxlich has managed to view this gold medallion award winning collection of fine Shiraz grapes at close hand as he gently dabs at them with the Preparation H. He found it terribly embarrassing going into the chemists to buy the Worlds leading haemorrhoid product to “relieve rectal itch and anal pain”* so he picked up a new toothbrush and some Ralgex at the same time. He was very careful when unpacking the carrier bag to ensure the two products were placed at opposite ends of his bedroom in case a 3am trip to the toilet was required and he picked up the wrong tube.

Tomorrow Yaxlich is going out to buy a childs inflatable ring to put on his office chair.

* if any copywriters are reading this, you might consider giving a pitch to the folks at Preparation H as Yaxlich thinks they could do with a new marketing slogan.

Friday, July 06, 2007

Dramatic Chipmunk

Yaxlich will blog more about his prolonged absence from t'internet later but, in the meanwhile, he thought he would post some more videos because it's

  1. Lazy
  2. Easy
  3. See above

He is particularly enamoured with the dramatic chipmunk. It makes him laugh. A lot.

If you have not discovered the pleasure of the dramatic chipmunk then he suggests you watch this clip

After that, view the Kill Bill remix

The Lost version is funny too

And finally watch the Dramatic Veronica version. It's not particularly ground breaking but Yaxlich thinks that Veronica is very cute. In fact she made his Beefy McManstick go funny.

Thursday, July 05, 2007


Yaxlich was experimenting with technology earlier today and he has come to the conclusion that he's not very good at it. He was trying to record a bird that lives outside his flat. Every morning it wakes Yaxlich up with it's cheery singing and he wanted to share it.

This bird doesn't just chirp or chirrup like any normal bird. No. This bird sings the opening line to "I'm A Barbie Girl". It doesn't just sound a bit like "I'm A Barbie Girl", it IS the opening line to "I'm A Barbie Girl" and he realised that without some kind of proof that you would never believe him which is why he was found standing outside his flat this morning pointing his mobile phone at a tree.

So there you have it. It turns out that the little birdie in the tree had his mojo all along. It wasn't Doctor Evil after all.

No Mo Mojo Woe